Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Confession: I'm Gonna Miss Them

 I know I said I wasn't gonna miss them at all, but today, I was almost in tears thinking about 5 days away from these two, especially. I dont know if its that the twins are older and not really that much "work" or that I think of them as much more independent, but I'm not feeling REALY bad leaving them:) 
But Ella and Elijah- I spend pretty much every hour of my day with these two cuties!
 And I think I will miss them (and the twins) while I am away! 
I know they will be in VERY good hands with Daddy and Grandma and Grandpa and all the rest of the family! I dont need to worry! I get very afraid that tragedy will strike(like me going down in a plane crash) and that their lives will be completely shattered and it will ruin them for good.
But I DO have a heavenly Father that I can trust to take care of them in the event this actually happens.
Which I know in all reality is a very minimal chance...
My mind just goes there...

 Maybe its the rain today that has put me in this melancholy mood..
We've spent a lot of time cuddling on the couch under a blanket! 
Its fun and cozy and warm...
Look at those eye lashes- arent they gorgoeous? or should I say handsome?
I wonder if he'll hate  his long lashes when he is a teenager?

well, off to cuddle again and watch a little tv ( I have a few shows to catch up on while the kids play)
2 days and I am leavin on a jet plane..


5 comments:

Erin Neiner said...

Aw, Chas. I think I feel that way even when I get a Mom's night out. It's like---WHOO HOO, I'M FREE FOR AWHILE---and then the moment I get in the quiet car, I am quite sad and missing them already! It's a good thing, to feel that way, right!!! That means you really love what you do! :) I always like to "do something" to help ME get through the away time. 2 years ago I flew out to visit my family with just (then--baby) Jack. I felt so badly for leaving Drew (though he was fine) but to help ease my "guilt" I made him a daily little package to open. A small bag for each day with a little note like "I love you to the moon" with stickers or a drawing and a special little "treat" (candy or toy) for the day. I labeled them according to the day so he had something to look forward to each day. Then, toward the end, I was adding in the countdown of when they would see mommy. I am sure it was more for me than him, but he did seem to love it. Just a thought. :) It can be simple---bc something like that can become complicated---which you DON'T want right before a trip. WELL----have a great time, nonetheless!!!!! :)

Erin Neiner said...

p.s. sorry for writing a book. ;)

Beth said...

Well, I enjoyed the book, Erin! :) Thanks for your honesty, Chas. I'm sure we ALL could be honest and say that our minds go places they shouldn't and we think all those crazy "what if's". I know I've done that this year more than ever! When I would think about my kids growing up w out their daddy and me raising them w out him I would go crazy, but it helped me when someone told me that whatever happens in my kids lives this year is God's will for THEM and He would give grace, strength, help, whatever they need to perform His will in THEM! I always feel so guilty about leaving the "baby" of the family. The older ones understand the concept of time and have memories and know that you'll come back. For the little ones it's harder. (GREAT idea, Erin, w the ltitle countdown "game") This time away will be but a distant memory soon enough- ENJOY every minute! have fun. :)

Beth said...

sorry for writing a book also ;)

Unknown said...

You guys are GREAt and I so enjoyed reading both your"books"- by the way, I think both of you would make amazing authors- you should each write a book filler with crafts, kids projects, pictures! I would buy it!
I am SO going to do your idea, Erin- I LOVE it! I already write out what I'll need! Thanks!
And Beth, I am sure you can totally relate to the "what ifs". I think going thru a tragedy of some kind makes you think thoughts that can REALLY discourage and cause fear. (my dad was killed suddenly when I was 19 and from then on I have REALLY struggled with this every day- the fear of loosing someone you love so much) But God is good and what a great reminder that He has a plan for our families that is SO much greater than our own- and it might even mean loosing a child or a spouse- Love you girls and thanks for your blogs and encouragement you daily give to other moms:)